Table Talk Tuesday #1

Chris- What is that?
Me- It’s doggie-ice cream.
Chris- Doggie ice cream… It looks like vanilla.
Me- Kinda doesn’t seem to come in other flavors.
Chris- What flavor ice cream would a dog like? Rabbit? Steak?
Me- He seems to like the taste of his own butt.
Chris- (chuckles) It’s Ass-Cream…

Unfortunate Marketing Strategies.

Or, Chanda can be exceedingly sophomoric sometimes.

I think they could have come up with a better name for this product.

This is just down right politically incorrect.

Several things going on here, but at the least I hope she can get a shot to take care of that.

That’s IT!  I’m switching to a port.

Ya know, I think this one works.  Too bad it’s taken, that is what I would name MY hot sauce recipe.

Actually, I think there are unwritten rules…

Well, that’s just WRONG!

I have to stop now.

My Quest

Today I am taking a baby step in becoming a happier, healthier, more motivated & funner Mommy.

I am taking the next 20 days to compile my list of 101 goals to accomplish in 1001 days to begin 1 May 2009 and end 27 January 2012.
Everything on this list will be geared toward becoming a better woman, better mommy & better partner. With the idea that all three of those sides of me are intertwined. From spending time to spending money & saving time to saving money.
This is slightly less than 3 years. I have some lofty goals for the next 3 years of mine and my children’s lives. At the end of this exercise:

• I will have an 8 and a 9-year-old.
• I will be 36 years old.

I have to keep in mind that this is not a sprint, it is a marathon… a very scary marathon.  I will work on not being a perfectionist about it 
Anyway… I hope to have at least most of my goals (daily, weekly, monthly, yearly) filled in by my start date.  It will go live here: My 101 in 1001 on 1 May 2009.
I could use some encouragement, ideas and comments.

My brave thing

What can YOU accomplish in 1001 days???

But Daddy Has….

Me: ‘Mornin! What do you want for breakfast: cereal or eggs?
Michael: Chocolate pop tarts!
Me: Cereal or eggs?!
Michael: Chocolate pop tarts!
Me: We don’t have pop tarts.
Michael: But daddy has pop tarts…!

…sigh… That’s because daddies have guilt. Not huge amounts of it like mommies have. Just enough for him to think that chocolate pop tarts do anything other than make them happy/quiet long enough to finish them.
My babies came home today from spending nearly 5 straight days with their father. It was obvious they were ready to come home. They practically BEGGED for structure.
They immediately asked to do all the thing they know they cannot do at home:

• play in my garden
• get in the pool (60* today)
• dessert for not finishing lunch… (Dessert with lunch???)

In general it takes most of the day to get them acclimated back to real life. Threats are made & sometimes tears are shed.
I’ve discovered it’s a tad easier to ease them back to reality as long as what they want causes no pain to the other one and does not involve my fledgling garden.

Weekend Randomness

Time to clean out my the page in OneNote where I keep all my random things. It’s gotten out of control and I must keep these things SOMEWHERE….

Mortality by Numbers

• 3 – The number of acne related deaths recorded in Mexico.
• 162 – The number of deaths by a fall involving a chair recorded in the United States.
• 8 – The number of flatulence related deaths recorded in Egypt.
• 2004 – The year these stats were compiled.

I find this quote to be quite true:

If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.

– Robert X. Cringely

I’ll take this one… But I would like my $100 RR to be white with blood red interior, please.

Stupid Americans by the Numbers:

55 – The percent of Americans that know the Sun is a star.

Dumb Florida Laws:

• Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
• If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle. (must be part of the Fair Elephant Treatment Act…)
• It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit. (This explains the beach at Playlinda, but not all the picketing)
• Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal. (But they’re so cute!!!)